On receiving love #mayflowers

I’ve written before about how it’s harder for me to accept love (also help, care, affection, etc…) than to give it. There’s this stubborn stubborn part of me that really thinks I can handle things on my own. Even when I don’t need to. Even when I don’t want to.

This week I’ve been trying this practice of saying, “I am open to receiving love and goodness from the universe”. From the stars. From the earth. From the trees. From the animals and plants and beings, and from the people around me.

I’ve noticed how when I say this, my body relaxes. Places of tension ease away, like, “Oh, we don’t have to hold this shit together so tightly.” It’s a surprisingly freeing feeling. And naming my intention to being open to love and goodness, generosity and smiles, hugs and laughter, has helped focus my awareness of those gifts around me.

My instinct after saying, “I’m open to receiving love and goodness” is to immediately follow that up with, “I’m open to giving love and goodness”. While I do think that is a great duo, I’ve been trying to stay in that uncomfortable open and receiving place for a bit.

Even though it’s hard and uncomfortable at first, honestly, it’s really helping me relax. And helping me notice the ways the earth and stars and people already love and care for me. And to actually be open and receptive to that energy and care.

This may sound so simple, and it really is. BUT truly, it’s helping me feel more comfortable, more relaxed, less afraid, and more open to those around me. I’m enjoying the way my smile comes so naturally to my face in this openness. The way people I’ve just met reach out their arms to hug me, and want to talk to me. The way I can be caring and cared for by friends. The way taking in love helps me overthink things a tiny bit less. The way when I start to feel shaky or anxious, I just look for the trees, and feel their life and groundedness. The way being open to love helps me be more open to myself.

I’m grateful.

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