Silver buttons through faded button holes on my big blue coat, scarf tied around my neck, curls dancing, I stepped onto the beach today.
I always walk the same direction. Today the wind beat against me, making every effort to deter me from my usual path. My ears stung from the cold and the failed hood-up attempt.
I tried to pray, ask what God thought about the crazy ideas stirring in my head and heart, but the wind was quite distracting. I found a place semi-sheltered by cement/rock blocks and stood there, watching the roaring ocean and whipping sand.
The wind still tickled my face and tousled my curls, even here. Seeing the ocean storm is glorious. I got distracted from my ideas and questions.
I walked back, this time with the wind. I barely had to lift my feet. At the end of a barrage of questions I asked my Maker this, “Be there?” The immediate response was, “Always.”
As the wind propelled me forward I thought about God’s plan and call. Sometimes it’s fierce, wild, clear. Like the wind today. I can do nothing but. Any attempt in the other direction or standing still is pointless, ridiculous almost. It’s like those moments I feel most alive. Why would I do anything else? Why would I be anywhere else?
Then there are times when God’s call stills to a whisper, or even silence. Like a gentle breeze. It’s harder to tell which way to go. Perhaps there are options, many ways that God would bless.
Always in cycle there are times when the wind becomes monotonous, routine, boring even. I question my purpose, my ears, my call.
At times with the wind come sand, hail, storm. It hurts. Hearts break. Pain seems normal.
After dry spells and heated times, the wind brings refreshment, healing, new life.
The constant in all is wind. God. God’s call. God’s plan. Whether it burns within, pushes forward, opens choices, strengthens through drought, storms, or rejuvenates, the wind is there. God is there.
I may ask a million times. Be there?